Introduction

I navigate through life by feeling connections.

It’s not a super power or anything. It’s more like I make decisions using my gut. To me, making connections has helped me give meaning in everything that I do – so that in turn motivates me even more to do the things I love! Especially knowing that it makes me happy and other people happy.

I believe that I have gone very far from having this ability and I’m very thankful for it.

However, having this sentimentalized view of the world can be scary because you’re automatically vulnerable to all the negative energy that flows through Earth. As you put your heart and soul into everything; for instance, helping a classmate with their assignment or even giving money to a homeless person, you can easily be manipulated by others because of how much you pour into the relationship regardless if it is deep or not.

Another worrying thought is the idea of reciprocity. 

Yes. 

Okay. 

It’s all right to give something to someone without expecting anything! It’s a great thing to do sometimes. I do it too! But… you can’t just keep giving and not receive anything back! It’s like taking care of a piece of rock, you know? You can take care of it as much as you want but can it really give anything back to you besides potentially being a nice piece of something that you can add in your living room to make it more aesthetically pleasing?

As a person who is passionate about feeling connections, I’d like to believe that the person who I will help or spend time with feels the same level of connection! Yet, it always doesn’t end that way for me. Although, it is better to trust the goodness that people may have, I realize now that it is better to be safe than sorry. You should be cautious about investing your emotional energy to anyone because otherwise you could end up hurting yourself and potentially losing all that you have.

Not feeling that mutuality can feel shitty.

You know that you shouldn’t expect too much from that person but COME ON!

Everyone wants to feel that the person they care about is concerned about them too. We all want a person that will make us feel like things will be okay despite being surrounded by all the chaos in the world.

Yet, because you love helping people out and not getting anything back, you end up being like their "unpaid therapist".

That aint right.

So, if you’ve reached the end of this post, I welcome you to my blog! I will be sharing my experiences and encounters of being someone’s “unpaid therapist”. I’d like to share these stories to help people who are also struggling with these tendencies to identify with my experiences and know that they are not alone. I hope to encourage people to find the strength to love themselves more! Lastly, I hope to promote self-care! simply because we all need it :) 

Please note that I will not be disclosing anyone’s real identity, so I will not reveal their actual names or gender. I will most likely use a funny code name lol.

Thank you!